Weird. How your simple existence, just even your proximity near me already makes me run. Leave. That feeling I used to have before. The one that makes me ecstatic is no longer palpable. Non-existent.
That your words I used to find precious to hear now turned to just mere empty words. I used to listen to your voice, notice and savour your diction and every sentence construction you made. Watch how your lips part, how you smirk, how noticeable your jawline was when you make those short laughs. But now I just barely look at you as you speak. Smile and nod from time to time. No longer paying attention. Wondering, what happened to the feeling I used to have.
I guess. It really died. And as much as I want to save the remains of what changed me to who I am at the moment, I cannot find the cadaver of my emotions floating in the river of my thoughts. As if it was blown away by my zephyr. Leaving the coldness and rigor behind.
Now, I just see you. But looking past through you. Shedding empathy to that one precious thing I've lost. A flower left to die. River left to dry. Affection left to rot.
Yes. It's ok babe. You can let go now. I can let you go now.Labels: heart, letting go, realization, relationship, self